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How can I persaude my 325 pound cousin to lose weight with me without hurting her feelings?

I weigh 167 pounds and I want to lose 40 pounds. I plan on getting in shape this spring and I am really serious. I talk about it around my cousin, but I think she lets her pride stop her from admitting that she has a weight problem. I want to help her while I help myself. I really care about her and I want her to be healthy. Please give me your sincere advice.

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15 Responses to “How can I persaude my 325 pound cousin to lose weight with me without hurting her feelings?”

  1. reallyfatgirl87 said :

    I think that people who really care about each other will tell each other the truth. And that means confronting her about her weight.

  2. Ang M said :

    question back….does she really DESERVE compassion at this point?

  3. chloe.bines said :

    Rather than suggesting that she needs to lost the weight talk to her as though you feel insecure about your weight. Speak to her and ask her to join you in excercising every week but say that you want her to do it with you because you feel unconfident about your looks and want someone you care about and trust to come with you so that you arent alone. This will make her feel like shes helping you rather than her feeling that you think she needs to loose weight! Good luck !

  4. moon_maiden42 said :

    You should tell her the exact same thing you posted. That you love her and worry about her, but that you want her help for you to get fit together. Talk to her about health, not weight. Get her walking with you, and working out with you. Tell her, you need her motivation to help you. That may help her move beyond her pride keeping her from doing it.

  5. No-Man said :

    Just ask her to go to the gym with you so you don’t get bored going by yourself. If she signs up, you’ve won the first battle.

    The second battle will be to keep her going. That will be even harder. But whatever you do, make sure it’s about YOU TWO, and not just her, or not just you. You have to make her feel that it is a joint effort every step of the way. If you can do this, you have won the second battle.

    If she ends up liking the gym and the progress she has made, and starts making sure YOU go to the gym, then you will have won the war.

    Good luck.

  6. Lady Redneck said :

    tell her you need a workout buddy

  7. Jo said :

    Get her to join you in your excercise regime. Just say “hey I’d love some company in getting in shape, want to do it with me?” She’ll get the hint and most likely want to get in shape with you. Hopefully this works. Some overweight people simply don’t care about their weight and have no desire to change. Her attitude will determine her success at weight loss. Good luck to you!

  8. NY Lonestar said :

    maybe you should go easy on how you approach it. tell her you want to lose weight because of the major health risks associated with being overweight. tell her you can’t do it alone, and you were hoping she would help you, and meanwhile you could help her. make her feel more like you need her to succeed and explain how it would be great if you could help each other.

  9. inland_empire_1 said :

    Its like dealing with a person with an addiction.

    You can offer support, but until they want to change their lifestyle, and make the changes for themselves, there really isnt much you can do.

    When you go to her, dont beat around the bush regarding your feelings. Be Honest, and up front about them. IF you come off sounding wishy washy about the situation, she may be able to turn it around someway. Make her know how much it concerns you, and tell her you will be there to assist when she’s ready.

    Keep contact with her on a daily basis, but dont push weightloss daily. Dont make her resent you and your offer to help. She knows shes fat. She knows at some level that it will eventually kill her. She has to get it straight in her own mind that she can change. Just be there if when she decides to start thinking about the changes.

  10. kasandra k said :

    Give her a copy of the list I gave you. Make no comment on her present weight at all — she knows what she looks like.

  11. Máiréad said :

    If she is not convinced of wanting to lose weight, nothing will get her to admit it, and do something about it.

    If she won’t do it for the sake of vanity, then try the health angle. Diabetes, stroke, varicose veins, etc. Don’t try to push her into it, just tell her you are turning over a new leaf because you want to live a healthier life, and maybe she might like to join you.

  12. Autumn Cat said :

    Tell your cousin you need her to help you in losing weight. Tell her you want her to be your walking buddy cause you don’t want to walk alone. Make it like you’re the one who wants to do the excersize and need her for emotional support. As she helps you, she will be helping herself too. If she loses a pound, tell her how great she looks! It may motivate her to keep going. Also, get her to watch “The Biggest Loser” on tv. That may also be good motivation.

  13. hugsandhissyfits said :

    have her walk withyou daily start out easy and tell her ..and maybe share some meals…make them healthy..and snacks that are good and healthy also ..good luck!!

  14. Masseur_at_Play said :

    just tell her that you want to exercise and lose weight and would appreciate it if you she did it with you, that you plan to do it with or without her but would prefer with for emotional support

  15. SARAH♥ said :

    honestly just tell her the truth. U r concerned about her healthy so just let her no. she might be angry and embarassed at first but she will get over it.


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